Striving for Something

"You know there's a purpose for your life.  You long to live a life of true significance, and as you consider your life, you feel the pressure to do something -whatever that may be - and do it quickly.

"We've sensed it too, and we understand the ache that you feel. More than any other generation in history, ours is a generation that feels weight to do something, be somebody, make a difference, and then publish it to the world.  But striving in our own power only leaves us emptier than before and keeps us battling for worthiness.  It does nothing to quiet the longing we have to live the way God created us to live."

--from Tapestry Magazine website (April 2016)

Something about this resonated deeply with me.  Mostly, I think, because it is true.  There is a longing in my heart to do something.  To be someone.  Beside the longing is the fear that time is running out.  I can't be the only one feeling this invisible pressure.  The problem is, when we don't become as important as desired, thoughts of failure begin to settle in  Either we can't find anything meaningful to do, or what we tried didn't work out how we thought it should. How can the motivation to change the world and the acceptance of failure reside in the same body - and continue to do so over and over again with so many of this generation  More important, perhaps: How can it be fixed?

The things many try - work harder; never give up; follow your dreams - may be good advice, but they leave something out.  Even pursuing something with your whole heart can leave you feeling empty or unnoticed. I think the reason for this is that we chose what to do; we chose what kind of difference we wanted to make and then we chose how to go about it, striving in our own power to accomplish our task.  Maybe the problem is us.  Maybe it is our fault we feel empty.

We are burdened to do something and make a difference.  We long to find God's purpose for our lives.  Unfortunately, I wonder just how many of us ask God what our purpose is.  I fear even less of us actually listen for a response. I know I myself have been guilty of this.  I have told God what I want to do and asked for His help.  While this in and of itself may not be wrong, how many times have I missed a better opportunity because I did the planning?

We live in a world of alarm clocks and deadlines, of day planners and social media.  There is the pressure to Do Something right now, and tell everyone about it. Again, these things on their own are not bad.  A scheduled life is good, so long as you haven't lost peace through your plans or run out of time for God.  We don't want to live so in the moment that we have no foundation for the future.  But nor do we want to try so hard to map out our plan for changing the world, that we forget to ask the One who created the world how we should do it.

The more we try to make a difference on our own, the more the potential for failure hangs over us.  We are so often left feeling unworthy or useless when we look at our lives, compare them to others around us or in the media, and feel something is lacking.  God didn't create us to feel pointless and hopeless.  He designed us in His image, and sent His Son Jesus to save us.  Because of Him, we are worthy.  But only through Him.  If our worth and place in eternity comes solely through Christ, what makes us think that our worth on this life should come from anyplace less, or anyone else - including ourselves.  As Christians, we depend on God for eternity; don't you think we can depend on Him for this life as well?

We are too often trying to do something big and life-changing without listening to the one who changed our lives.  We know God has a plan and purpose for us.  I want to live out that plan everyday, for His glory.  Maybe that means taking a step back. Asking God what He wants me to do, and then listening for an answer! Asking Him what kind of difference I am called to make, and how to pursue it.  Asking how much of the world He wants me to change, and being content and courageous, no matter how big or small that portion of the world may seem to me. God views things different than man - He sees the heart of men, the past and future, the ultimate goal.  His will is always good, and always great.  Don't be deceived by man's perspective of big or small.  Don't be afraid if God ends up calling you somewhere or to do something that you think is too small, or too big!  He absolutely knows what He is doing with you.  Follow God's will for your life.  Make God your new passion - then follow your dream; serving Him.  Work hard - serving Him.  And never give up serving Him.  That is how I want to do something - For Him.

Rested but Weary

"If my energy is spent or I'm just not into the work, the first thing I'm doing is to hold it up to the Lord.  Am I doing the wrong thing? Am I managing my time poorly?  It's okay to feel tired sometimes, but I shouldn't be weary if I'm doing what He's called me to do.  If He's called me, He's equipped me."   - Tapestry Magazine, issue 1

If my energy is spent, the first thing I'm doing is trying to get some extra sleep, or reaching for some (probably unhealthy) food to keep me going.  I lose patience and cry far more easily. Sometimes I complain, or constantly zone out.  Sometimes I'll talk to God and ask Him to get me through it.  These are my responses with being tired or weary.  My first response should be to go straight to God when I'm tired.  But when I'm weary, day in and day out, there might be a deeper problem to address...

First, what am I doing?  How and when am I doing it? Am I in God's will?  Life is so full, with so many responsibilities, requirements, and rushing.  Do I stop and consider God's plan in the midst of my own scheduling? I get tired of hearing people say how the enemy is attacking them, how they are too tired to participate, that they are too busy to come.  People have so much going on, they add to it constantly, then complain when they grow weary.  And here I am doing the same.  Then we push on and often grow more weary.  And more frustrated at exhaustion or failure.  The catch is, if we are doing things - even good things - without working with God and through His purpose, what is actually going to succeed on the level we anticipate?  Why do we try to do things on our own, then become surprised when it doesn't work out?  When weary in daily activities, the first thing to be done is lay them before God.  Ask Him what He would have us do with each task, project, or commitment.  Does my lifestyle need to change, are my priorities straight, or do I need to drop something completely?  God has equipped me to do what He has called.

As I read through Tapestry's article, something in the back of my mind bothered me: don't Christians, in God's will, ever become truly weary? But if He has equipped us, how is this possible? Then I realized, this was written with the author's assumption that your relationship with God is already correct.

This brings me to my second point, the second thing we should do when we feel certain we are in God's will, and yet still find ourselves in a constant state of weariness: check our relationship with God.  It may be deeper than making sure your actions and plans line up with God's.  It may be your heart.  We need to make sure our heart is lined up with God.  Perhaps this should be done before checking our actions, but I fear few people would think to check their hearts first.

 Anymore, it is hard enough to get people to go to church even once a week, let alone read their Bible every day, forget getting something out of it.  It is no wonder we have a nation of weary Christians.  Even if you are acting inside His will and are in His place for you, if you are not abiding in Him and cultivating that relationship, you will grow weary.  We need both: to have a growing and faithful relationship with God, as well as the knowledge and conviction that we are living and acting inside His will.

This means take it to God.  Give it all to God.  Your plans, your worries, your obligations, your frustrations. Your family time, church time, personal time, work time, sleep time.  Are you sure you are managing this the way God would have you? Am I certain that I have talked to God about what I am doing? Beyond that, do I know that my relationship with God is where it should be? Have I spent any time with Him lately?  If the answer to any of these questions is no, I think that is our problem. Going to God, and fixing what is wrong, will be our way out of the constant state of weariness.